There is a very specific balance of arrogance and humility that I work for every day. It is not easy. Sometimes the hubris takes over. You're pretty sure you know what's up and you tell everyone around what that is. You know your shit. You got this. And then sometimes you find out your friends are doing amazing things and you feel a little left out and you shrink back into your shell a little. And then the humility takes over.
I'm even battling it right now; I've rewritten this post three times. Because at first it I was too full of myself. And then I was too meek. And then I was too bitter, which I realize isn't on the scale between arrogance and humility, but is sometimes a bi-product. A mountain-sized burning-tire-odored skinless-grape-textured bi-product.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Thursday, June 21, 2012
It's Hot, Right?
I mean, holy shit, it's hot out. And it's all we're talking about. And it's what I'm going to talk about.
How do I cool this room down? Do I open a window and put a fan in it? Does that just pull more hot air in along with bugs and other potentially dangerous animals? Do I black out the windows and just lie perfectly still? What will relieve this heat? My roommate bought an air conditioner; I have never been more jealous of him. One, for the forethought, and two, for the means to purchase it. I have a fan that I accidentally stole from a friend while moving 5 years ago. Also, he has apparently cranked the AC so high that is actually cools down the foyer also. It's nice for the 10 seconds I'm standing in the foyer from stepping inside from the sweltering hallway. But then I make the trek down the hall into my room and it's like "POW, YOU CAN'T AFFORD COLD AIR, BITCH."
Ugh. It's just hot. That's all I have to say about it. My wrists are resting on a blazing hot computer chassis, and it's making me uncomfortable. I mus remain perfectly still.
Also, it's the humidity.
HEAT UPDATE: Oh My God. It's only the first day of summer and I'm melting. I have a pretty hard rule about not going out in public in shorts; I broke that rule today. I also wore flip-flops. And this fan fuckingblows doesn't work.
How do I cool this room down? Do I open a window and put a fan in it? Does that just pull more hot air in along with bugs and other potentially dangerous animals? Do I black out the windows and just lie perfectly still? What will relieve this heat? My roommate bought an air conditioner; I have never been more jealous of him. One, for the forethought, and two, for the means to purchase it. I have a fan that I accidentally stole from a friend while moving 5 years ago. Also, he has apparently cranked the AC so high that is actually cools down the foyer also. It's nice for the 10 seconds I'm standing in the foyer from stepping inside from the sweltering hallway. But then I make the trek down the hall into my room and it's like "POW, YOU CAN'T AFFORD COLD AIR, BITCH."
Ugh. It's just hot. That's all I have to say about it. My wrists are resting on a blazing hot computer chassis, and it's making me uncomfortable. I mus remain perfectly still.
Also, it's the humidity.
HEAT UPDATE: Oh My God. It's only the first day of summer and I'm melting. I have a pretty hard rule about not going out in public in shorts; I broke that rule today. I also wore flip-flops. And this fan fucking
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
It Was Picture Day
Yesterday was One Day, Ten Photos Day. Check out my pics here: Nancy's 10 Photos.
Monday, June 11, 2012
How Good Moods Fade
I was in a ridiculously good mood this morning. The type of good mood that pisses other people off. I had no real reason to be. It was 4am and I had only gotten about 2 hours of sleep. But I was standing in the train station outside of work, listening to my iPod, just doing a little dance. I was in that good of a mood.
By noon, I was NOT in a good mood. I had talked to a lot of people by then, and most of the them were mad at me. One of them accused me of not speaking English based on the fact that I didn't hear him ask for a sandwich. By the way, this is unacceptable to me. I powered my way through the transaction, but I made sure he was aware that it is incredibly rude of him to ask me,while wearing sunglasses indoors, if I speak English simply because I didn't hear him. He won't change his ways, I'm sure-once an asshole, always an asshole.
And that's how good moods fade. You put yourself in the real world where people are supportive and nice. In improv, people are supportive and nice. Even when they're not nice in the scene, they're nice in general. And they're supportive. They don't walk into a coffee shop looking for a fight. Or, if the scene called for them to walk into a coffee shop looking for a fight, they would, but still, they wouldn't be assholes about it. What I'm saying is that improv is better than real life. Improv creates good moods. Real life creates bad moods.
By noon, I was NOT in a good mood. I had talked to a lot of people by then, and most of the them were mad at me. One of them accused me of not speaking English based on the fact that I didn't hear him ask for a sandwich. By the way, this is unacceptable to me. I powered my way through the transaction, but I made sure he was aware that it is incredibly rude of him to ask me,while wearing sunglasses indoors, if I speak English simply because I didn't hear him. He won't change his ways, I'm sure-once an asshole, always an asshole.
And that's how good moods fade. You put yourself in the real world where people are supportive and nice. In improv, people are supportive and nice. Even when they're not nice in the scene, they're nice in general. And they're supportive. They don't walk into a coffee shop looking for a fight. Or, if the scene called for them to walk into a coffee shop looking for a fight, they would, but still, they wouldn't be assholes about it. What I'm saying is that improv is better than real life. Improv creates good moods. Real life creates bad moods.
Friday, June 8, 2012
Slowly but Surely
Oliver took a two month vacation, and it's taking a bit more prodding to get full on into work mode than was expected. My thoughts have been over taken by coffee and improv, sometimes at the same time. I have Netflix laying on my floor. I don't even know what discs are in the envelopes; it's sad. Unwatched Netflix is my primary indication that I'm just too busy!
I'm not, of course, actually too busy. There are a lot, a whole lot, of people who are way busier than me. And who handle it much better. I'm just tired and lazy and don't want to pick the Netlfix up from the floor. And I like to sleep. So the Netflix go unwatched for a few days or a week. I'll get to it eventually, because it's in my list of priorities just below eating, sleeping, and improv, but above laundry and grocery shopping. So don't worry about me, I'll get to watching and reviewing movies and TV shows from 5 - 20 years ago soon!
The 2 month break was somewhat of an experiment. It failed, really. I was experimenting with the idea that putting a pin in Oliver would give me more focus on other things. I beat myself up over not writing enough sketches and scripts, etc. What I failed to recognize is that Oliver was an outlet, and an outlet was good. Oliver is a bit of a conscious for me. Or he's not at all that, because that's a little too out there to say a blog I write is somehow another part of my brain that makes me know the difference between right and wrong. It's not that. I take that back. But he was important to me, so I'm bringing him back.
I kicked it off with the homage to Best Friends Forever, my new favorite TV show. Hell, it's just my new favorite thing. We've been given six episodes, and I've already watched those 6 at least 5 times. The first Sunday after BFF day, my BFF and I made cinnamon rolls and had a BFF Marathon. It was amazing, and one of the only types of marathons I'd ever participate in.
So, slowly but surely, Oliver will come back to life. He'll still be just as aimless as ever, because when you keep starting over, that's how your thoughts go--aimless and wandering.
One other thing: I received the greatest compliment in quite some time the other day and I've been reveling in it ever since. I went to the improv jam on Wednesday night and was called up in a group that my teacher was in. FF to the next class and I said "I went to the jam on Wednesday" and she said "Yeah you did. And you crushed it." So when I feel even a little down, or I almost fall asleep on the train and miss my stop, I just hear her voice say "Yeah you did. And you crushed it." It makes me feel good, because crushing things feels awesome.
I'm not, of course, actually too busy. There are a lot, a whole lot, of people who are way busier than me. And who handle it much better. I'm just tired and lazy and don't want to pick the Netlfix up from the floor. And I like to sleep. So the Netflix go unwatched for a few days or a week. I'll get to it eventually, because it's in my list of priorities just below eating, sleeping, and improv, but above laundry and grocery shopping. So don't worry about me, I'll get to watching and reviewing movies and TV shows from 5 - 20 years ago soon!
The 2 month break was somewhat of an experiment. It failed, really. I was experimenting with the idea that putting a pin in Oliver would give me more focus on other things. I beat myself up over not writing enough sketches and scripts, etc. What I failed to recognize is that Oliver was an outlet, and an outlet was good. Oliver is a bit of a conscious for me. Or he's not at all that, because that's a little too out there to say a blog I write is somehow another part of my brain that makes me know the difference between right and wrong. It's not that. I take that back. But he was important to me, so I'm bringing him back.
I kicked it off with the homage to Best Friends Forever, my new favorite TV show. Hell, it's just my new favorite thing. We've been given six episodes, and I've already watched those 6 at least 5 times. The first Sunday after BFF day, my BFF and I made cinnamon rolls and had a BFF Marathon. It was amazing, and one of the only types of marathons I'd ever participate in.
So, slowly but surely, Oliver will come back to life. He'll still be just as aimless as ever, because when you keep starting over, that's how your thoughts go--aimless and wandering.
One other thing: I received the greatest compliment in quite some time the other day and I've been reveling in it ever since. I went to the improv jam on Wednesday night and was called up in a group that my teacher was in. FF to the next class and I said "I went to the jam on Wednesday" and she said "Yeah you did. And you crushed it." So when I feel even a little down, or I almost fall asleep on the train and miss my stop, I just hear her voice say "Yeah you did. And you crushed it." It makes me feel good, because crushing things feels awesome.
Friday, June 1, 2012
Watch Best Friends Forever
I find it difficult to write about things I love because I just end up writing "I love it, it's amazing" over and over. I'm going to try to expand on that a bit, but seriously, I love Best Friends Forever and it's amazing. And yes, it's funny, hilarious even, and real. But also, seriously--just flat out amazing.
Here's the thing too--this is the show that I wanted to write. I lay awake at night dreaming about a show I could create someday, a show with heart and comedy about amazing women living in the city and trying to make a life in some sort of triarrage situation. Really, I have treatments to that effect. I've written outlines. And maybe I came close to the idea I had in my head, but Lennon Parham and Jessica St. Clair nailed it. I actually went through a 5-second blind rage as I watched everything I was aiming for come alive on the screen. But then the white flash faded and I fell completely in love.
I have watched the first four episodes at least 6 times each. I watch them on my phone on the subway on the way to work. Then I watch them on my break. And again on the way home. And when I can't sleep I lie in bed and watch them. It doesn't help me sleep, but it sure makes me feel good. I'm watching them again right now. Some people might say I have a problem. Those people can go to hell because damn it, I love it.
I wonder how they made something so wonderful and so pitch perfect. But then I just accept that Lennon Parham and Jessica St. Clair are way better at comedy and life and being best friends than I'll ever be and I sit back and enjoy it.
I read (or saw) an interview with Ms Parham and Ms St. Clair and they mentioned that while preparing for the show, they watched this Laverne&Shirley video a lot:
That actually made SO much sense to me. There have been a decent number of comparisons with Laverne&Shirley already, so I won't belabor the point. And I don't really appreciate when new things are just referred to as old things but for now. It's just that they're both magic.
The show has reportedly been canceled and subsequently my heart broken. If I had the technology, I would make this show in my apartment. Hell, I would just put on the stage show in my apartment. (Hey Lennon and Jessica, can you just put on a stage show once a week? In my apartment? I'll provide snacks!) I'm having trouble processing that the one shiny spot in my television lineup will be gone. It also makes me worry for the future. And not just the future of television, but the future of civilization because this is the type of quality entertainment we should be making and consuming.
I meant this post to be a simple call to your televisions tonight to turn on NBC at 8pm and watch the best g-d show there is right now. I went a little off track and maybe got a little too creepy with all the gushing lovey adjectives. But seriously guys, watch this show. And if you have a Nielson box, really really watch it. Watch it four times, in all your rooms (I don't know how those work).
If the conclusion to this story is inevitable; if it is already written in the blood of Jeff Zucker's grandchildren, then I'll take the six episodes we were given and carry them with me and watch them at least once a week to remind myself what happiness is. But if there is even an iota of a chance that we can save it, damn it all, I will do whatever it takes to save it. Tell me what it is, and I'll do it. Sign the petition? Done. Buy the iTunes season pass? Done. Tweet #SaveBFF all the time? Done. Write an embarrassing feeling filled blog post? Done. Please, NBC, don't take it away. Best Friends Forever leads with its heart and it teaches us all how to actually be good friends, and good people, to each other. And it's fucking good, so watch it. Also, it throws in a lot of Michigan / Wolverine references, and I go ape shit for that.
Here's the thing too--this is the show that I wanted to write. I lay awake at night dreaming about a show I could create someday, a show with heart and comedy about amazing women living in the city and trying to make a life in some sort of triarrage situation. Really, I have treatments to that effect. I've written outlines. And maybe I came close to the idea I had in my head, but Lennon Parham and Jessica St. Clair nailed it. I actually went through a 5-second blind rage as I watched everything I was aiming for come alive on the screen. But then the white flash faded and I fell completely in love.
I have watched the first four episodes at least 6 times each. I watch them on my phone on the subway on the way to work. Then I watch them on my break. And again on the way home. And when I can't sleep I lie in bed and watch them. It doesn't help me sleep, but it sure makes me feel good. I'm watching them again right now. Some people might say I have a problem. Those people can go to hell because damn it, I love it.
I wonder how they made something so wonderful and so pitch perfect. But then I just accept that Lennon Parham and Jessica St. Clair are way better at comedy and life and being best friends than I'll ever be and I sit back and enjoy it.
I read (or saw) an interview with Ms Parham and Ms St. Clair and they mentioned that while preparing for the show, they watched this Laverne&Shirley video a lot:
That actually made SO much sense to me. There have been a decent number of comparisons with Laverne&Shirley already, so I won't belabor the point. And I don't really appreciate when new things are just referred to as old things but for now. It's just that they're both magic.
The show has reportedly been canceled and subsequently my heart broken. If I had the technology, I would make this show in my apartment. Hell, I would just put on the stage show in my apartment. (Hey Lennon and Jessica, can you just put on a stage show once a week? In my apartment? I'll provide snacks!) I'm having trouble processing that the one shiny spot in my television lineup will be gone. It also makes me worry for the future. And not just the future of television, but the future of civilization because this is the type of quality entertainment we should be making and consuming.
I meant this post to be a simple call to your televisions tonight to turn on NBC at 8pm and watch the best g-d show there is right now. I went a little off track and maybe got a little too creepy with all the gushing lovey adjectives. But seriously guys, watch this show. And if you have a Nielson box, really really watch it. Watch it four times, in all your rooms (I don't know how those work).
If the conclusion to this story is inevitable; if it is already written in the blood of Jeff Zucker's grandchildren, then I'll take the six episodes we were given and carry them with me and watch them at least once a week to remind myself what happiness is. But if there is even an iota of a chance that we can save it, damn it all, I will do whatever it takes to save it. Tell me what it is, and I'll do it. Sign the petition? Done. Buy the iTunes season pass? Done. Tweet #SaveBFF all the time? Done. Write an embarrassing feeling filled blog post? Done. Please, NBC, don't take it away. Best Friends Forever leads with its heart and it teaches us all how to actually be good friends, and good people, to each other. And it's fucking good, so watch it. Also, it throws in a lot of Michigan / Wolverine references, and I go ape shit for that.
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