Oh Sweet Computer Death

     As I get older, I'm learning to be more patient and to not lose my shit so often.  More and so often are important qualifiers in that statement.  Just moments ago, I watched my computer practically melt, at least in a digital sense.  Every program that was open flashed on the screen and then closed.  Then approximately 50 warning signs popped up.  The desktop went black. 
     I restarted the computer, foolishly hoping it was just a fun game it was playing with me.  The computer restarted, but the desktop was still black, there were no programs available, and the error messages started all over.  Hard drive this and hard drive that.  Critical error this and critical error that. Clearly there was something wrong with the hard drive. 
     The computer is not completely broken.  I'm writing this post on it right now!  And I'm on email!  It does, however, keep telling me about hard drive clusters and more critical errors.  And again, there are no actual programs on it.  I don't  actually know how I got the internet to show up. 
     What I'm not doing right now is freaking the fuck out or losing my shit.  Oh what progress into being a grown-up I've made!  Ten years ago if my computer had shat itself and then melted before my eyes, I may not have taken it as well.  About two to three years ago, my external hard drive hit the ground and started clicking.  It was a pretty awful moment--my nearly completed thesis film was on that hard drive.  All I could do was crawl into bed and pull the covers over my head and hope it was a dream.  I don't recall really losing my shit over that one, except when people asked the inevitable "did you back it up?" question.  Because of course I didn't.  If I had, there wouldn't really be a story.  But anyway, I digress. 
     That moment actually taught me a whole hell of a lot about how to store things and how to feel about the things I'm storing.  First of all, MozyHome backs up every damn thing on all my computers on their super servers.  It's not free, but it's worth the peace of mind.  Secondly, I'm just storing files; I'm not storing people or memories.  There's really nothing that can't be recreated.  Or, if there is something that can't be recreated then print it and hide it in a lock box or something.  These things are just machines and if the movies have taught us anything, it's that machines cannot be trusted. 
     I'm going to save and post this right now, because I'm not sure how much longer it will be until the grim computer reaper comes to fully take this computer away.  And I'm just going to sit here wand watch it fade into the good night.  And then replace its hard drive.