Friday, August 26, 2011

Secure the Riggin


     I'm actually more concerned about being bored than I am the possibility of starving to death when the power goes out and I have zero food in my apartment.  Yesterday, I was calling bullshit on the storm.  I was still planning to made the trip up to NYC on Saturday.  I was "peshawing" on Irene.  It was all just panic; the storm would head back out to sea before it reached the Carolinas.
     Egg on my face.  I woke up this morning to news reports of Tropical Storm Warnings and evacuation orders.  The MTA is shutting down.  Amtrak already canceled their south-bound trains, surely the northern routes were next.  The weather report used the phrase "rapidly deteriorating."
     Then I started thinking about how prepared I actually was.  Turns out, I am zero percent prepared.  I might have a flashlight somewhere in my room.  The milk in my fridge is bad.  I don't have any other food in there, save for a bottle of champagne and some old beer.  In my cupboard I have a box of oatmeal and a bag of spaghetti.  That is all.
     I started thinking about the things that could be done with the limited supplies I had, and I quickly realized that all of those things would be moot if the power went out.  The power going out is a very real possibility.  Oh no.  The power.  I started thinking about all the things I needed to make sure were charged, like my phone and my computer.  And then, ugh, it sunk in.  If we lose power, there will be no internet.  No television.  No movies.  I'll be so bored.  This is terrible.
     I'd be happy to chew on dry spaghetti noddles and wash it down with scotch for two days, but how am I going to entertain myself?  Read?  For two days?  Come on!  Sure, perhaps I could finally make a dent in Infinite Jest or brush up on Theories of Aerodynamics.  But the entire time I'd be thinking about the dent I could be making in The Mary Tyler Moore Show or the new releases on Netflix Watch Instantly.  I haven't made it through my third viewing of season three of Parks&Rec yet.
     I can already imagine the spiral of depression this boredom will put me in, and I'll end up sleeping through the entire storm.  I'll be dehydrated and malnourished when it finally passes through.  Also, the windows in my apartment are probably the original windows from the 1800s when the building was built.  This should be of greater concern.  However, I've never been able to open them, so I'm assuming the hurricane won't be able to either.  Yes, I am saying that I am at least as strong as the hurricane.
     I've seen the videos from other hurricanes of people boarding up their windows.  It occurred to me for a second, but was immediately followed by the thought that 1. I rent and 2. I'm not doing that.  I'm still trying to stay on the cool, calm, and collected side of this whole hurricane preparedness ordeal.  A recent view of the tracker on the weather.com page finally made it sink on that no shit, Irene is on her way.  Stand fast.  Secure the Riggin. 

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